Wednesday, August 09, 2017
edith hesterly browne.
telling the story of how a new human joins the world is overwhelming. we welcomed our sweet edie on friday, august 4, 2017 at 8:37 pm. but let me back up.
on tuesday, the 1st, i went to the doctor for my 38 week appointment. at the previous week's appointment, i was still measuring ahead a little bit, and they did an ultrasound that showed a ~7lb-ish baby and a lot of amniotic fluid. they said we'd measure again the next week. so we did another ultrasound and the fluid was still high. we also did another NST and she did fine but took longer to "pass" than she had the following week. when i got in to see the provider, she started talking about gestational diabetes and recommended an induction that night.
based on my experience with hollis's induction, i knew i had to push back a little bit. i used the excuse of my birthday on the 2nd to see how much of an "emergency" it was to get her out. the provider said we could wait, but only until thursday. hmmm. i asked for the weekend and she said no and that i needed to monitor my blood sugar (it never spiked and was totally fine through delivery).
my birthday was a great day. i got a prenatal massage while mandy and nicole watched the big kids. all three of us took a nap. justin and i got some yummy takeout for dinner. i got lots of calls and texts and sweet emails from family and friends. it was low-key, but turning 36 and being 38 weeks pregnant, i figured it would be anyway.
the afternoon of my birthday, jillian took me to get a pedicure and the ob's office called to tell me my induction was scheduled thursday night at 9pm. whew. thursday arrived and justin was able to stay home from work, thankfully. i went to another doctor's appointment where they confirmed the call to induce. i was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced, so i was hoping to make a little progress over the course of the day. i got home and went wild cleaning bathrooms, vacuuming, etc. i was not thrilled about being induced, but i also felt like i had no choice. i could write a whole post on medical care and the fear mongering that happens during such a sensitive and emotional time, but that's a different story.
anyway. we ate dinner and bathed the kids and got them to bed with promises that daddy would be there to get them in the morning, ready to meet their baby sister. jb and i sat on the couch to watch some tv and pass the time waiting to head to the hospital. right as our neighbor was getting to our house to pull the overnight shift, the hospital called; they said they were super busy and to call back at 10. ummm, what? so we sent faye home and went for a walk. i was having tons of anxiety - at this point, i hadn't slept since the previous night and i was nervous about not even getting to the hospital until almost midnight and then trying to get things going. but that's what we attempted to do.
faye came back over at 9:40 and we headed to the hospital. we walked up to the check-in area in L&D at 10 and proceeded to get fussed at by the intake nurse. she was like "you were supposed to CALL at 10, not just show up!". i was pretty upset. i mean, either it is medically necessary to induce me or it's not, right? anyway. they stuck us in the waiting room. we sat there for about 20 minutes and justin was like...we just need to go home. so he went and talked to them and they said to show up again between 7 and 8 friday morning. we turned around and drove back home - the best decision ever.
i didn't sleep a ton thursday night (of course), but definitely got more rest than i would have at the hospital. the kids were mega confused in the morning (hollis: "where's my baby sister?"), but we had a chance to explain the situation to them quickly and then head BACK to the hospital with them safely in faye's hands. they had a great day with faye and her kids, nanny mandy and her kids, and then kk and jj when they got into town.
at the hospital, they stuck us in the waiting room AGAIN, but only for a little bit. then they pulled us into a room and we began the longest slowest process ever. it was nearly 11am before i even saw the midwife. it was kathy and she was not super friendly or excited to be working with us, it seemed. she checked me and i was still only 3cm and she said i was not effaced at all. super demoralizing. but they started the pitocin and we were off. side note: kathy was unclear as to why we were inducing, which was super upsetting, but i couldn't focus on that because we were there and two of the other providers had said it needed to happen. still frustrating, though.
the pitocin was ok. i spent a lot of energy getting to a mental place where i thought i could handle being on that stuff again, and i think i really did pretty well. the contractions cranked up regularly, but they were really manageable. around 3 or 3:30, kathy came back in to check me again. she offered to not because she didn't want me to be discouraged, but i really wanted information. sadly, i was still at 3cm, but soft and thinning, maybe 50% she said. ugh. she said baby's head was still high and floating, so because she wasn't engaged, i wasn't dilating. because of the excess amniotic fluid, breaking my water was not an option because of the risk of a chord prolapse. but because of the excess fluid, there wasn't anything to help her descend. frustrating to say the least.
the other thing that happened around this time (i think) is that kathy said there was "something else" near the baby's head. ummm, what? as jb said...this is something you don't say to a woman in labor. she speculated the baby may have flipped to breech, so she got an ultrasound machine. thankfully, she was still head down, and kathy thought it was maybe just an arm in front of her head or something. in any case, this was additional discouraging information, as i knew it would be even harder for her head to engage if she had her arm in front of her face.
at this point, i sought the wisdom of the internet because i didn't feel like i was really getting suggestions from anywhere else. spinning babies suggested a move called the lift & tuck to help baby's head descend and engage. it consisted of standing and lifting my belly about 2 inches at the start of each contraction, then tilting my hips forward through the contraction. they said to do this for 10 contractions in a row, so i did. i don't know if this is what did it (by this point, the pit was up to 11), but by the end of that, the contractions were brutal and i was having some intense back labor and having to moan through each contraction. the contractions were also coming super frequently - like each minute - and felt like they were lasting an eternity. i also felt a trickle at whatever point and realized my water had started leaking, which i felt like was great but also made the contractions even worse.
around 6 or so was the end of kathy's shift and these mega contractions had been going on for over an hour. the leak had started right after 5pm, so i was hoping this had kicked some things into gear. kathy came in one last time and checked me and i was 4cm. kill me. i started getting super demoralized at that point, trying to calculate how much longer i could deal with contractions this close and this intense to get all the way to 10cm. yeesh.
a little later (time ceases to exist for me at this point), danielle, the new midwife on call, came in. she was amazing and i liked her immediately. she said i was maybe 4.5cm and i said i may want the epidural. i immediately began apologizing and she was like "you have absolutely nothing to prove". justin also reminded me that i was super codependent to be in the state i was in and apologizing to other people for wanting the epidural. ha.
the epidural gets ordered and what followed was the longest hour of my life. they pumped all the fluids in and i continued to have insane contractions every 20 seconds. finally FINALLY the anesthesiologist shows up and he's fast and all business. i was scared and also still having psychotic contractions, so that was all a bit intense, but he got it done. the relief was pretty much immediate and i could not believe it. i looked at justin and told him i could cry from how happy i was to have that relief. seriously amazing.
i chilled in the bed for maybe 30 minutes, relishing the difference between what had been going on and what was happening post-epidural. i could still move my feet and feel that contractions were happening, but it was like it was happening through a shield. at about this time, i told our nurse mandy that i was feeling pressure and may be ready to push soon. she got danielle a few minutes later.
when danielle checked, she said i was 9.5 cm and she could manually take me to 10 if i wanted. i said absolutely, let's do this. they got my legs up in the stirrups and jb held my right leg while mandy counted and danielle talked me through it all. pushing was very natural and we went through about 3 rounds of counting to 10 and her head was out. danielle delivered her shoulders and then told me i could grab her and pull her onto me, so i did. it was absolutely incredible. she cried for a couple of seconds and then calmed right down and i just rubbed her and looked at her while we let the cord pulse. justin cut the cord when it was done and we got to get a better look at her. she had a decent amount of vernix, and my immediate reaction was that she was way smaller than emme or hollis (they were both 7lbs 14oz). i guess you forget how tiny babies really are because when they weighed her a few minutes later, she was 8lbs 5oz, 21.25 inches. holy cow! her apgars were 8 and 9 and she was gloriously pink.
so that's it. 8:37pm after the longest day ever. i will never again talk about how short/fast my labors are. ha. it was rough but so unbelievably worth it. she is perfection and we are completely in love.
on tuesday, the 1st, i went to the doctor for my 38 week appointment. at the previous week's appointment, i was still measuring ahead a little bit, and they did an ultrasound that showed a ~7lb-ish baby and a lot of amniotic fluid. they said we'd measure again the next week. so we did another ultrasound and the fluid was still high. we also did another NST and she did fine but took longer to "pass" than she had the following week. when i got in to see the provider, she started talking about gestational diabetes and recommended an induction that night.
based on my experience with hollis's induction, i knew i had to push back a little bit. i used the excuse of my birthday on the 2nd to see how much of an "emergency" it was to get her out. the provider said we could wait, but only until thursday. hmmm. i asked for the weekend and she said no and that i needed to monitor my blood sugar (it never spiked and was totally fine through delivery).
my birthday was a great day. i got a prenatal massage while mandy and nicole watched the big kids. all three of us took a nap. justin and i got some yummy takeout for dinner. i got lots of calls and texts and sweet emails from family and friends. it was low-key, but turning 36 and being 38 weeks pregnant, i figured it would be anyway.
the afternoon of my birthday, jillian took me to get a pedicure and the ob's office called to tell me my induction was scheduled thursday night at 9pm. whew. thursday arrived and justin was able to stay home from work, thankfully. i went to another doctor's appointment where they confirmed the call to induce. i was 3cm dilated and 80% effaced, so i was hoping to make a little progress over the course of the day. i got home and went wild cleaning bathrooms, vacuuming, etc. i was not thrilled about being induced, but i also felt like i had no choice. i could write a whole post on medical care and the fear mongering that happens during such a sensitive and emotional time, but that's a different story.
anyway. we ate dinner and bathed the kids and got them to bed with promises that daddy would be there to get them in the morning, ready to meet their baby sister. jb and i sat on the couch to watch some tv and pass the time waiting to head to the hospital. right as our neighbor was getting to our house to pull the overnight shift, the hospital called; they said they were super busy and to call back at 10. ummm, what? so we sent faye home and went for a walk. i was having tons of anxiety - at this point, i hadn't slept since the previous night and i was nervous about not even getting to the hospital until almost midnight and then trying to get things going. but that's what we attempted to do.
faye came back over at 9:40 and we headed to the hospital. we walked up to the check-in area in L&D at 10 and proceeded to get fussed at by the intake nurse. she was like "you were supposed to CALL at 10, not just show up!". i was pretty upset. i mean, either it is medically necessary to induce me or it's not, right? anyway. they stuck us in the waiting room. we sat there for about 20 minutes and justin was like...we just need to go home. so he went and talked to them and they said to show up again between 7 and 8 friday morning. we turned around and drove back home - the best decision ever.
i didn't sleep a ton thursday night (of course), but definitely got more rest than i would have at the hospital. the kids were mega confused in the morning (hollis: "where's my baby sister?"), but we had a chance to explain the situation to them quickly and then head BACK to the hospital with them safely in faye's hands. they had a great day with faye and her kids, nanny mandy and her kids, and then kk and jj when they got into town.
at the hospital, they stuck us in the waiting room AGAIN, but only for a little bit. then they pulled us into a room and we began the longest slowest process ever. it was nearly 11am before i even saw the midwife. it was kathy and she was not super friendly or excited to be working with us, it seemed. she checked me and i was still only 3cm and she said i was not effaced at all. super demoralizing. but they started the pitocin and we were off. side note: kathy was unclear as to why we were inducing, which was super upsetting, but i couldn't focus on that because we were there and two of the other providers had said it needed to happen. still frustrating, though.
the pitocin was ok. i spent a lot of energy getting to a mental place where i thought i could handle being on that stuff again, and i think i really did pretty well. the contractions cranked up regularly, but they were really manageable. around 3 or 3:30, kathy came back in to check me again. she offered to not because she didn't want me to be discouraged, but i really wanted information. sadly, i was still at 3cm, but soft and thinning, maybe 50% she said. ugh. she said baby's head was still high and floating, so because she wasn't engaged, i wasn't dilating. because of the excess amniotic fluid, breaking my water was not an option because of the risk of a chord prolapse. but because of the excess fluid, there wasn't anything to help her descend. frustrating to say the least.
the other thing that happened around this time (i think) is that kathy said there was "something else" near the baby's head. ummm, what? as jb said...this is something you don't say to a woman in labor. she speculated the baby may have flipped to breech, so she got an ultrasound machine. thankfully, she was still head down, and kathy thought it was maybe just an arm in front of her head or something. in any case, this was additional discouraging information, as i knew it would be even harder for her head to engage if she had her arm in front of her face.
at this point, i sought the wisdom of the internet because i didn't feel like i was really getting suggestions from anywhere else. spinning babies suggested a move called the lift & tuck to help baby's head descend and engage. it consisted of standing and lifting my belly about 2 inches at the start of each contraction, then tilting my hips forward through the contraction. they said to do this for 10 contractions in a row, so i did. i don't know if this is what did it (by this point, the pit was up to 11), but by the end of that, the contractions were brutal and i was having some intense back labor and having to moan through each contraction. the contractions were also coming super frequently - like each minute - and felt like they were lasting an eternity. i also felt a trickle at whatever point and realized my water had started leaking, which i felt like was great but also made the contractions even worse.
around 6 or so was the end of kathy's shift and these mega contractions had been going on for over an hour. the leak had started right after 5pm, so i was hoping this had kicked some things into gear. kathy came in one last time and checked me and i was 4cm. kill me. i started getting super demoralized at that point, trying to calculate how much longer i could deal with contractions this close and this intense to get all the way to 10cm. yeesh.
a little later (time ceases to exist for me at this point), danielle, the new midwife on call, came in. she was amazing and i liked her immediately. she said i was maybe 4.5cm and i said i may want the epidural. i immediately began apologizing and she was like "you have absolutely nothing to prove". justin also reminded me that i was super codependent to be in the state i was in and apologizing to other people for wanting the epidural. ha.
the epidural gets ordered and what followed was the longest hour of my life. they pumped all the fluids in and i continued to have insane contractions every 20 seconds. finally FINALLY the anesthesiologist shows up and he's fast and all business. i was scared and also still having psychotic contractions, so that was all a bit intense, but he got it done. the relief was pretty much immediate and i could not believe it. i looked at justin and told him i could cry from how happy i was to have that relief. seriously amazing.
i chilled in the bed for maybe 30 minutes, relishing the difference between what had been going on and what was happening post-epidural. i could still move my feet and feel that contractions were happening, but it was like it was happening through a shield. at about this time, i told our nurse mandy that i was feeling pressure and may be ready to push soon. she got danielle a few minutes later.
when danielle checked, she said i was 9.5 cm and she could manually take me to 10 if i wanted. i said absolutely, let's do this. they got my legs up in the stirrups and jb held my right leg while mandy counted and danielle talked me through it all. pushing was very natural and we went through about 3 rounds of counting to 10 and her head was out. danielle delivered her shoulders and then told me i could grab her and pull her onto me, so i did. it was absolutely incredible. she cried for a couple of seconds and then calmed right down and i just rubbed her and looked at her while we let the cord pulse. justin cut the cord when it was done and we got to get a better look at her. she had a decent amount of vernix, and my immediate reaction was that she was way smaller than emme or hollis (they were both 7lbs 14oz). i guess you forget how tiny babies really are because when they weighed her a few minutes later, she was 8lbs 5oz, 21.25 inches. holy cow! her apgars were 8 and 9 and she was gloriously pink.
so that's it. 8:37pm after the longest day ever. i will never again talk about how short/fast my labors are. ha. it was rough but so unbelievably worth it. she is perfection and we are completely in love.
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