Sunday, December 30, 2012

38 weeks.


week: 38

baby stats: well, the baby is the size of a baby now.  the length of a leek, size of a pumpkin.  weight and length at this point are averages, so assuming this baby is about the same size as emme at this point, s/he is probably around 7 pounds now.  i can't wait to see him/her.  

aversions/cravings: still coasting on my christmas free day.  my heartburn is in full effect, so nothing is super satisfying when you re-visit it for hours on end.

bump: out there.  tried on my belly cast from last pregnancy again, though, and i can still fit an arm or two in there compared to where i am now.  pretty sure that extra room was not baby.  ha.  and this belly is still plenty big.  

worries: my head is in a decent place.  of course i have a lot of anticipation/nervousness.  stuff like wanting to make sure ek is a-ok when i go into labor.  stuff like worrying that my labor will be so crazy fast that i'll have a baby in the car.  stuff like wanting to accommodate schedules of who's attending the birth and who's helping out at home (including but not limited to: my parents, alison, my doula, justin, etc.).  but all of that is just logistics, and i am mostly just trying to harness my chi about the whole ordeal.  

boy or girl?: i'm still calling boy.  

missing the most: sleep.  normal sinuses.  

pregnancy milestone: lots this week.  i got checked at my 38 week appointment on friday and i'm 2-3 cm and 80% effaced.  is that too much info to share on a blog?  anyway...i didn't get checked until 40 weeks with ek, and i was nowhere with her and she was born less than 48 hours later, so i am not really placing any stock in this bit of information.  still, it's interesting/somewhat exciting for me.  i also have been losing my mucus plug (worst name for any activity your body performs ever) today, so that is also exciting.  again...doesn't mean anything until it does, but all signs point to things starting to progress, albeit slowly.
anyway.  we packed our bags on friday night and cleaned out cars and installed the car seat base this weekend.  all clothes and bedding are clean.  i picked up a bassinet from wendy and it's ready to go (well, it has my birthing ball in it right now, but other than that it is ready).  so.  the checklist is complete, really.  i'm on top of laundry, the house is reasonably clean, all christmas decorations are put away.  all we need is a few more days (i think it would be nice to resume a routine for ek, which happens on wednesday.  i also like the idea of 39 weeks.) and a baby....

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

37 weeks.

week: 37

baby stats: i love reading things like "babies born between this point and 42 weeks are considered full term".  yay!  our baby is the size of a winter melon this week, whatever that means.  s/he averages 6.13 lbs. and 19 inches.  both my midwife and chiropractor think this baby is an average size at this point, so things appear to be in a good place.  i don't feel like i'm going in to labor any time in the super near future, but really who knows?  the countdown is on.  

aversions/cravings: i got a free pass from my doc for christmas day and i totally lived it up.  i ate 2 cookies and a whole lot of other carbs that were amazing.  i feel like i can make it through the home stretch.

bump: getting bigger by the minute, it seems.  the lady at the door for christmas mass said "looks like you're going to be getting a christmas gift pretty soon".  yes ma'am.  also, when i am still for a few minutes, it looks like aliens are wrestling in my belly.  love it.  

worries: i am starting to anticipate labor (finally).  i'm trying to relax my mind and body and accept that it will be what it will be, but i do have the whole pressure of my awesome first birth experience to "live up to".  i know this one will be different and awesome in its own way, but i just hope i can do it all again.  i also am super excited/anxious about breastfeeding again.  i just hope i have the ease i had with emme this time too.  

boy or girl?: still having a hard time thinking that it could be a girl, but mostly i'm just curious to see him/her.  

missing the most: still sleep.  some nights are ok, but the hip/pelvic pain are hard core and my mind is busy busy.  

pregnancy milestone: i have the list of stuff to pack for the hospital (haven't actually packed it yet, but i think that will happen today....).  i also have the infant car seat out and just need to install it.  i did my pre-registration paperwork online for the hospital.  slowly slowly checking items off the list....

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

predictions.

my co-workers (the ones that sit in my little 4-cube area with me who are my favorite people at my company) have begun predicting the outcome of this pregnancy.  for posterity, i'm recording it here.  if you read this blog (do people read this blog?), feel free to add a comment and i will add your prediction here.  the most accurate predictor may win something, when and if i get it together to create things again.  wendy was almost 100% right on her emme prediction, so i'm anxious to hear what she says - i think she was 3 oz. off but got date and gender correct.  i don't think i'm quite ready to make a prediction yet.  let me cross a few more things off my to do list then i will add my thoughts.  whee!

david: boy; january 5.  no weight/length prediction because "those are just details".

jen: boy; january 8, 9 a.m.  8 lbs. 3 oz.; 21.5 inches.

kay: boy; january 13, 1:44 p.m. 8 lbs. 1 oz.; 21 inches.

emma: girl; january 4, 11 a.m. 7 lbs. 9 oz.; 20.5 inches.

wendy: boy; january 11; 7 lbs. 14 oz.; 20 inches.

justin: girl; january 11; 8 lbs. 4 oz.; 20 inches.

kk: boy; january 9; 8 lbs. 7 oz.

jasmine: boy; january 8, 8:00 p.m.; 8 lbs. 8 oz.

me: boy; january 18, 4:33 p.m.; 8 lbs. 4 oz.; 21 inches.

karen g: boy; january 2; 8 lbs. 10 oz.

lolo: boy; january 6; 7 lbs. 12 oz.

jeff a: boy; december 31/january 1, midnight; 7 lbs. 10 oz.

Monday, December 17, 2012

36 weeks.

week: 36

baby stats: this week bebe deux is the size of a crenshaw melon or a honeydew.  as a side note, emme had some honeydew at breakfast this weekend, and her saying honeydew is adorable.  i digress.  the average baby is about 6 pounds and 18 inches at this point.  s/he is gaining weight at the rate of an ounce a day.  four weeks to go (give or take).  whew! 

aversions/cravings: i made chocolate chip cookies from scratch for emme's teachers last night.  they smelled and looked amazing.  i really want some desserts. 

bump: i just had my 36 week appointment and am measuring exactly on track.  i thought this was a big growth week, but everything still looks normal and good.  liane felt my belly today and said it feels like a normal size baby (not the 32 pound baby i sometimes think i might deliver) and like i have a lot of water, which is great. 

worries: i'm starting to get really excited more than anything.  this morning, i saw someone's facebook post announcing the birth of her baby and i thought to myself "awwww, i want a new little baby!".  and then i remembered i'm pregnant and that is going to be me (not the facebook post, but the baby part) in just a few weeks!  it's going to be awesome, i think. 

boy or girl?: well, i told my mom last week that i would be SO surprised if this baby is a girl (and i maintain that i will be).  she reminded me that i said the EXACT same thing about emme.  which is probably true.  so...i'm still thinking boy.  but i'm also still thinking it will be one or the other.  ha.  we need to decide on some girl names. 

missing the most: sleeping.  the last week or so has been pretty rough for sleep.  pubic symphisis, peeing 3-4 times a night, emme waking up because of her cough/snotty nose...i guess it's all just part of prepping for when the kiddo shows up. 

pregnancy milestone: i filled out all my work paperwork for maternity leave and made a list of stuff to bring to the hospital.  i also moved ek's car seat to the side so i can install the infant seat base some time this week.  whoa.  i think the only major thing left is to get the bassinet situation set up so this bug has somewhere to sleep.  and to find our bouncy seat, which is MIA.  oh, i also need to talk to my boss since she's still in intense denial about the fact that i'm having a baby (she is still sending me meeting requests for january and asking me to take action items due in mid-january).  yeesh. 

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

instag-randomness.

looking through my phone pictures from the last couple of days, i think emme is hilarious lately. i think i thought that kids go through the whole pull-all-their-clothes-off-and-run-around phase a little earlier than now, and i guess i just figured we weren't going to go through that particular rite of passage. oh, but i was so wrong. every day when i pick her up, emme is in some state of undress. her newest preference is pulling one arm out of her neck and hanging out with the one-shouldered look. the highlight of her day is after dinner (and sometimes before), when she is allowed to strip down and run gleefully through the house shouting "iiiiiiii'mmmmm NAKED!". it's too funny/adorable to try to make her stop.

anyway.  i'm saying this only to explain the lack of clothing in the photos below.  the first was on a random night this week when she not only stripped before dinner, but also convinced me she needed 3 clementines (i usually stop her at 2).  she started putting them in front of her teeth like a mouth guard - what a funny kid.  the second happened on sunday afternoon when she discovered an additional pack of christmas stickers my mom sent in a package.  her daddy showed her how to peel them off the backing by herself, so she decorated her body, including the snowman on her belly button, my favorite touch.  she pulled her pants off so she could make sure she had a sticker on each knee, obviously.  third, and featuring her preferred one-shoulder look, is from last night when i squirted a small dollop of readi-whip onto her blackberries for dessert because she had eaten a PILE of spaghetti, meatballs, and spinach.  maybe i should give her sweets a tad more often so she knows how to control herself?  and finally, fully-clothed, is ek before school on monday, our first day of real cold this year.  she just looks so big in winter clothes, i can't take it!  and the face she is making is the face she now makes when i ask her to smile for the camera.  what a ham.  





Monday, December 10, 2012

35 weeks.

week: 35

baby stats: this is when the fruit comparisons start to get redundant and/or ridiculous, i think.  smalls is roughly the size of a honeydew melon or a coconut (i think coconuts are fairly small compared to some of the other recent fruit, but what do i know?).  so, approximately 5.25-5.8 pounds and 17.5-18.5 inches long.  baby's kidneys are good to go now, hearing is fully developed, musculoskeletal system is fully developed, and lungs are looking good.  the rest of this baby's time in my uterus is really about putting on lbs. and getting ready for exit.  

aversions/cravings: as expected, with the holidays on the horizon, i just want food.  i want to be in my kitchen baking and cooking and having lots of random people show up and eat at my house. 

bump: i am measuring right on track as of last week.  we start weekly appointments next week, so that is exciting as far as keeping track of growth.  i am definitely feeling the size of this kiddo lately - this is an active little niblet.  my belly button has still not popped out (it never did with emme), but i also don't have a linea negra this time (with her there was like a black tire track down my belly). i know there is a lot of growth to go over the last weeks, but it's almost hard to imagine it can get bigger than this. 

worries: hanging in there.  the last week or so has brought a TON of movement (i guess as baby's size increases and the amount of amniotic fluid decreases), so even though it can be not super comfortable on occasion (and can interfere with sleep), i LOVE this part of pregnancy.  i also love knowing that we're almost to the "safety zone" of size/development (in my own head).  also, we're in generally decent shape with preparation - clothes washed, boppy cleaned, etc - so that makes me less frantic.  i also submitted the paperwork for bebe at emme's school.  i am still hoping to find a nanny for the first year, but at least we have a back-up plan for when i go back to work, so that is a huge relief. 

boy or girl?: i can't remember the last time someone looked at my belly and guessed it will be a girl, so i am still firmly on the boy tip.  as i always say, though, i will still be surprised either way. 

missing the most: agility.  i'm not even an agile/graceful person, but i don't love how hard it is to bend over, pick up emme, etc.  but...totally worthwhile, obviously. 

pregnancy milestone: i'm in full-on final weeks insomnia/pelvis pain fun.  i like to think of these weeks as training for the newborn.  i really can't complain, though - i am really excited.  this is about to get really real.  wednesday marks the 1 month until my due date mark.  whoa!!

Monday, December 03, 2012

emme at 2.

i never seem to have a format or organizational structure for these posts.  it’s really hard because i start writing about one thing and it makes me think of 57 other anecdotes and then i just spiral off.  i will attempt to summarize emme at age 2. 

physical: i am still stunned when i see pictures of this little monkey from even a few months ago.  her hair has grown so much and she is definitely turning in to the taller and leaner girl she is becoming and less of the slightly chubby baby i have been in love with for so long now.  that last little thigh roll is on its way out – a fact that makes my heart ache just a little bit.  as far as who she looks like, i think we still get comments on her resemblance to kk the most.  i occasionally see a picture that makes me think she is me as a small person.  but there are definitely many moments where she looks EXACTLY like jb – even if it’s just the expression.  she is busy and active all the time.  she loves to hang on stuff – the oven door, the freezer drawer, the dishwasher handle, and any other reachable bar that can support her weight. 
emme is still a champion sleeper, a fact i am thankful for daily.  she sleeps roughly 12 hours at night (7:30-7:30 or so) and takes 3-4 hour naps when she’s at home most days (2 hours is pretty typical for school).  she’s a great eater, another thing that i relish because it makes life SO much easier.  i thought she wasn’t crazy about spinach, but she recently started loving creamed spinach, so that’s back on the list.  most days, she will try anything.  she definitely has meals where she’s not interested in food at all, of course.  she is a toddler, after all.  but in general i do not stress out about her growth or nutrition, which is lovely for a worry wart like me. 
we are also so fortunate that ek is such a healthy kid.  after the ear infection battle last winter/spring, we have not really had an illness to speak of.  the tubes are doing what they’re supposed to be doing (yay!), and her immune system seems to be pretty robust beyond that.  i’m sure this winter (if we actually get a winter) may bring a few bugs to our house, but i hope we can avoid most of them.  she does get a persistent little cough every so often that i think is allergies – when it gets really bad, i give her zyrtec before bed and that knocks it right out.  most other nights i rub eucalyptus oil on her feet and that does the trick! 
if i had to pick a favorite outdoor activity for this little bug, i would go with sliding.  she can spot a slide from miles away – it is nuts.  she gets great joy just from pointing them out to us – especially the “twirly” slides.  inside, she loves reading.  it’s how we start and finish most days, a routine that i love.  she also is obsessed with her baby right now.  she is very nurturing and sweet with baby, but it can get a little intense.  initially, i set a whole lot of boundaries with baby – no baby at the table, no baby in bed, no baby in the car, etc. – but i have bent on most of those.  fortunately, she is somewhat reasonable (most days) about letting baby take a nap when we have something else pressing.  she does also tell us “i’m a good little mama” when she’s giving baby a bottle or whatever.  so cute. 
finally, under this category, is the potty situation.  she has been (what i would consider) potty-trained since mid/late october or so.  it’s amazing.  we definitely have accidents here and there (more at school than at home, where i am reminding her all the time), but i can count on one hand the number of poop accidents we’ve had.  she also totally understands when she has an accident and why, which is great.  i did a brief bribery attempt about a week in to the training where i would give her an m&m each time we had a successful potty trip (i did this because she was randomly resisting and i wanted to motivate her to push through).  so now, she still asks for a “special treat” after most trips to the potty at home.  it’s really funny.  we still diaper her at night and probably will for a while longer.  she is just so little and sleeps SO well.  and, let’s be honest, i am not interested in changing all her bedding several times a week.  she has dry diapers 2-3 nights a week, but that is not enough for me to take the plunge quite yet….

mental/emotional: emmeline is a talker.  i am amazed and entertained by her daily.  she sings and tells us things constantly.  she knows the full alphabet song – she went from a few letters and lots of mumbling to full articulation of the song and chorus in a matter of a couple of days.  it’s craziness.  she counts to 15 or so (maybe higher – she usually loses interest or starts giggling around 15), but it’s 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, eleven, 8, 9, 10, 11….cracks me up every time.  she’s also associating counting with numbering objects (as opposed to just naming the numbers from memory), which is fascinating to me.  we have that book click clack 123 and she counts the animals while pointing to them up to about 7 or 8 (which is the pigs, who she likes to point out are naked and then laugh).  for books that we read frequently, ek loves to complete the sentence.  her favorite right now is madeline (especially the page where madeline says “pooh-pooh” to the tiger at the zoo).  she’s really in to the night before Christmas right now, since we’ve been talking a lot about santa, the holidays, etc. 
emme is very attached to her “buddies” at school.  she talks about them and gets randomly fascinated with various ones each day.  she is obsessed with “bo-bos”, our word for small injuries.  she will invent a bo-bo on her own body and tell me about how one of her friends fell and got a bo-bo at school.  she will also try to doctor what she perceives as bo-bo’s on me…little does she know, most of it is just scars or random skin flaws i’ve acquired over the past 31 years.  anyway…i love that nurturing aspect of her little personality. 
i can get super frustrated with certain aspects of her school, but as a whole, i cannot say enough about what a montessori education has done for emme and our family.  i love seeing her curiosity and her engagement with the world. 

personality: emme kay is spunky and stubborn and a blast.  she is dramatic and silly.  a few stories to illustrate:
last night, we were wrapping up dinner and she had stolen my fork and had her fork.  she grabbed justin’s hand and asked if she could “cut his nails” with the forks.  then she started singing “where is thumbkin”, which is the song i sing to her when cutting her nails.  it was so endearing. 
also last night, we were winding down and getting snuggled up to read bedtime stories.  justin was still messing with her a little bit – pretending to bite her baby’s foot and growling.  she put her hand on his hand/baby and looked right at him and said “no, daddy.  it’s time for bed”. 
lately, when she is not in the mood to play/wrestle, she will tell us no and that we’re hurting her.  so dramatic.  when she does want to play, she will thrust her foot toward our faces and demand that we “bite the foot” and immediately erupt into giggles. 
she still points out every object in the sky and now we talk about where that object goes – helicopters and planes go to the airport; birds go to their nests; the moon gets bigger/smaller, etc. 
she could sing ring around the rosey a thousand times a day and thinks falling down is the greatest. 
she likes to be up on the counter exploring while i cook.  
she bosses the dogs around - excuse me, ollie.  kicked off, etta.  she is definitely not scared to tell them what to do, but also gives them lots of affection.  

i could think of a billion other stories and notes, but i am guessing this has already long bored anyone who is not in our immediate family.  i just have to say that parenting this child for the last 2+ years has been more fun and rewarding and delightful than anything i could have ever imagined.  even whenever she frustrates me (with the two of us as stubborn as we are, it definitely happens), i feel so so so lucky that i get to be her mom.  i want time to slow down immediately so i can fully immerse myself in everything she is doing each day, but at the same time i am so excited to see what’s around the corner.  i know people say it all the time, but each age is my favorite age yet.  i adore this little mosquito. 

now, on to the overload of pictures….



















34 weeks.

week: 34

baby stats: b2 is roughly the size of a butternut squash or cantelope this week.  4.75-5.8 pounds is the average range, and 17-19 inches.  more fattening and brain growth and development of the central nervous system.  i like to think of these final weeks as the finishing touches.  so fun. 

aversions/cravings: not too bad this week.  justin bought some southern comfort egg nog the other day, and i am exceedingly jealous of that.  as an aside, if you have not tried it and are not diabetic, go get it now.  it's the southern comfort brand (no alcohol in it, duh) and it's near the creamer/milk/etc. in the dairy section of the grocery store in a little quart carton.  black with white lettering.  i will add to this recommendation by saying i think egg nog is disgusting, but this egg nog is one of the more delicious substances on earth....

bump: we have our 34 week appointment tomorrow, so we shall see how things are growing.  i am still feeling relatively normal in terms of size.  i think i was full-on huge with ek at this point, so even if i look massive to the outside world, i don't feel nearly as massive as last time, so that is a nice change.  particularly since stupid texas refuses to participate in december and our weather has been in the 80s.  ugh.  

worries: pretty good this week.  we had a really busy and productive weekend, and i have an appointment tomorrow, so those are usually recipes for a saner me.  i called the midwife last week to discuss my fasting levels and she still thinks i'm good without meds, so that is awesome.  really hoping to keep that up, but it feels like every day is harder. 

boy or girl?: i had a dream last night that we were at an appointment with my ob and she told us it was a boy and then was like "oh, wait, you STILL didn't want to know?  it's just a few more weeks."  haha.  in my dream, justin cried with joy over it being a boy, so i'm not sure what that says about my subconscious pressure.  ha. 

missing the most: not waking up in the middle of the night to pee.  being able to stay awake past 9:30. 

pregnancy milestone: nothing major this week.  the pain in my pelvis is pretty amazing and earlier i think (or at least at this intensity) than with emme.  my chiro did adjust the pubic bone last week because i'm out of alignment there and i am still sore from that.  fun fun. 

Friday, November 30, 2012

big girl room.

we moved emme in to her big girl room some time around labor day.  but, it's really only now that i can call her room almost finished.  sigh.  projects take a long time around these parts.  i've been way too exhausted in the evenings to get much done these days, and the weekends are like a whirlwind.

in any case, her room was live-able, just not done.  and now, i think it's fairly close to both.  probably 94%.  which is about as much as we complete anything, sadly.

i was torn on the issue of moving emme to a real bed so early - over 2 months before her second birthday.  but, she had slept on pallets on the floor at my parents, and in a real bed while we vacationed in vermont, not to mention the nap mat at school, so i figured she could handle it.  i also wanted to give her plenty of buffer before small smalls was born so she didn't associate him/her with being kicked out of her crib.  finally, the room we moved her in to is right next to the kids' bathroom and i was hopeful that would be a help for potty training.

so.  it was a slow process.  we started talking to her about the room, telling her what things we would put in there, etc.  i picked out fabric for her quilt, which i hoped would be the base of her loose color scheme.  i'm not a theme person, nor am i one to adhere super-strictly to a pallet of any sort, but i knew there needed to be something somewhat cohesive with the room, so i hope i achieved that.  we painted. we dragged in some furniture and bought a couple of other items at target and ikea.  we debated whether to just leave the mattress on the floor - the montessori method recommends that - but ultimately, we thought it really needed to feel like its own space within the room, so we got a low frame from ikea.

the other stuff i wanted to do with the room were things like keeping it super minimal (montessori style), etc.  well, that didn't exactly work.  all of ek's toys were in our living room (the one that has no furniture in it) before, so it was more important to get all that stuff out of the common area than it was to keep her room sparse and monk-like.  it worked out.  i do need to work on de-cluttering some of the stuff that's no longer age appropriate, but for now, i think she's pretty ok with having all her goods at her finger tips.  she's also more than happy to drag it all throughout the house and leave quite the wake. let's just say i sing the restore song a lot.

and, that's it, i guess.  the pictures are all from today on my iphone.  her bed is not usually made (i wish i could lie and say it was), mainly because i can't deal with the belly and the reaching into the far corner, and emme is not big/skilled enough to make her own bed, and justin doesn't care about made beds at all.  but everything else is mostly as it usually is.  emme has done amazingly well with her big girl room.  it took 2 or 3 nights to adjust to the new sleeping sitch, but since then she has loved every second of it.  she still calls us to come get her in the morning/after nap instead of getting out of bed, which i love.  she's potty trained except for nights, and it's great having her bathroom right there.

please excuse the blown-out christmas tree and table lamp, and the darkness of the photos.  i'm doing the best i can....

 sitting area with blocks, puzzles, and (currently) christmas tree.
 bed!
 more books (they are taking over our lives - i love it), justin's old brio train set in the toy box.
 animals on shelves...probably need a few more shelves as it's pretty crowded up there...

Monday, November 26, 2012

giving thanks.

i'm hoping santa starts delivering new imacs some time in december because we really really need one so we can get back to posting all the pretty, nice pictures that justin takes.  our 1 TB hard drive is completely full and he's got all kinds of video projects (the paying, work-related kind) on there, so our family photos have taken a side seat since like june.  sigh.  anyway....for now i will keep posting iphone and instagram photos when i make the time to write. 

last week was thanksgiving.  my favorite holiday.  i love that there are no presents and the whole holiday is about eating and resting and spending time with those you love, reflecting on all the wonderful-ness in your life.  or at least, that is what i try to make the holiday about. 

this year, we spent the day at our friend wendy's parents' house in marble falls - a little texas town on a lovely lake in the hill country.  it's about an hour drive from austin, so it was perfect.  wendy's mom and aunts and uncles cooked up a feast like you wouldn't believe, and we got to relax inside and outside without having to cook or clean or really be responsible for much of anything.  it was kind of amazing, really.  the highlight of the day for me was when the boys were all shooting (and missing) a bb gun at this bell.  i was ready to leave (er, emme was ready to leave), and justin was taking his time.  i asked for a shot and hit the bell on the first pull.  it was a great moment for me - i love showing people up.  haha. 

my parents had a wedding the day after t-day, and i had lots of work and am 33 weeks pregnant, so since it didn't work out to spend the weekend with them, we were really delighted to be included in another family's festivities.  of course i missed my own mom's cooking - especially the cornbread dressing! - but we more than made the best of being apart. 

the rest of the long weekend was incredible, even if it was nothing super special/eventful.  we took the dogs for some walks, got our christmas tree, smoked a turkey and made turkey/sausage gumbo, watched a couple of movies (brave and the new spider man), watched football, hung lights on the roof, washed a zillion loads of laundry, including baby things, and hung shelves in ek's bedroom (only 3 months later!).  we literally never have days off with no one in town where we don't have to go anywhere, so i relished the time and really really really could have used at least one (but ideally like eight) more days to finish up projects, start new projects, take naps.  ha. 

in the spirit of thanksgiving, i would like to acknowledge that i have so so so much to be thankful for, big and small.  i'm grateful for the relationship i have with my parents - they are really supportive and really helpful and i love that i am friends with them.  i'm grateful for justin - he makes me laugh all the time and watching his relationship with emme is one of the greatest joys in my life.  i'm grateful for emme - i still don't know how i got to be this girl's mom...she amazes and delights me all the time and i don't think i comprehended "love you more every day" until i met her.  i'm grateful for our good health, including this healthy pregnancy.  health should never ever be taken for granted.  i'm grateful for our warm, comfortable home - even if it's not "the" neighborhood we want to live in someday.  i'm grateful for my job - even if i hate it most of the time, i am really lucky to be able to work in a place that is safe and flexible for good money and insurance.  i'm grateful for my love of animals...pets are an intense joy for me, no matter how much i complain about pippa's meowing or etta's neurosis.  i'm grateful for books and crappy television shows and roasted baby carrots with garlic and goat cheese and internet tutorials and cold fronts and math and potty training and coffee (and decaf) and online shopping and being able to sew and friendships and flip flops and mexican food and having perfect vision and gift certificates and baths and the smell of pine and midwivery and babies and chapstick and phone cameras and naps.  it's a good life. 

 hot cocoa with cameron (still delicious, even in 70 degree weather). 
 cuddle time with daddy and all the baby dolls (he will be so pleased i posted this pic). 
 grabbing a quick (and not nearly long enough) nap on the way to marble falls.
 helping wendy feed baby dillon. 
 the beginnings of a (mediocre) turkey and sausage gumbo. 
 showing folks how it's done. 
 good boy. 
helping daddy trim the tree.  she hugged several trees over the course of this experience. 

33 weeks.

week: 33

baby stats: for fruit this week, we've got durian fruit (what is that?) and pineapple.  so, a little over 4 pounds and probably around 17-18 inches.  this week is supposedly a growth spurt week and smalls is running out of room in my uterus, according to the internet.  ha. skeleton is hardening and wrinkles are decreasing, so s/he is looking more like a newborn every day. 

aversions/cravings: i want a big cheeseburger with grilled onions from five guys.  and a few sips of coke.  and french fries.  but mostly i'm ok. 

bump: measuring exactly at 33 weeks or so, so that is nice - i guess i can assume that doesn't mean i am going to have a 16 pounder...at our appointment on wednesday, smalls had flipped to head down (YAY!), so i am excited that things seems to be moving in the right direction.  a random idiot i work with just told me i look like i'm about to pop, but i don't think i'm anywhere close to the about to pop stage. 

worries: i'm doing ok.  the holiday was stupendous for my mental state - i had a chiro appointment, obgyn appointment, massage (from my birthday gift back in august), and 5 days off with my cute family.  my blood sugar has been in check - the midwife told me the fasting levels in the morning are the most important, and there's not a ton i can actually do about those, so we will keep an eye on them and decide whether or not to medicate.  so far, i'm staying below 95 more days than not, so no meds yet.  hoping to stay that way so i can avoid an induction and pharmaceutical intervention. 

boy or girl?: emme still says girl.  i still say boy.  justin changes his mind daily. 
missing the most: being able to comfortably hold my toddler, and get up and down from the floor with ease. 

pregnancy milestone: i made it through my first holiday with gestational diabetes.  ha!  i think christmas will be much harder (and longer), but i did well for thanksgiving and it wasn't as hard as i thought it would be.  i also got almost all the bebe's clothes/bedding/blankets/etc. washed this weekend, so that is huge.  i even washed my boppy and will pick up a new cover for it and then be pretty much ready, i think.  need to set up the bassinet and find/buy a new bouncy chair and probably some 0-3 month clothes, but mostly things are getting there.  my sprinkly last week was really nice - i have some lovely friends. 

Monday, November 19, 2012

32 weeks.

week: 32

baby stats: i seriously forgot at some point this week which week we were on.  i thought i lost a week somewhere, but thankfully it really is only 32.  whew.  anyway, this week, smalls is the size of a honeydew or a jicama or a squash.  the estimate from the internets is around 16.7 inches and somewhere around 3.75 lbs.  this little thumper has toenails and fingernails and hair and is gaining fat and all that other new baby goodness. 

aversions/cravings: cookies.  pancakes with syrup.  chips.  pasta with cream sauce.  sourdough bread.  cereal.  toast with butter.  decaf vanilla lattes.  hot cocoa.  rice in or on or with anything.  do i sound like a complainer yet? 

bump: i have an appointment on wednesday, so i am interested to see what's happening in this department.  i am theoretically supposed to be gaining a half pound of baby every week at this point, but i don't feel the intense growth-spurt belly that i felt with emme - at least, not yet.  i'm sure it will come.  

worries: not terrible this week.  i saw a chiropractor last week and will go again tomorrow (and weekly, probably, until the end).  getting my pelvis adjusted felt amazing, and had the added bonus of making bebe extra wiggly for a couple of days, so that was fun.  i've been doing inversions in the evening and my blood sugar has been in control, so both of those things help me think i'm being proactively helpful to this kiddo.  i went to a class for the diabetes last week, so that was also good in terms of getting on point with math for my meals, which i always love.  i am trying not to be super whiny about the gestational diabetes, but it really is much harder/more mentally trying for me than i expected.  lots of self-pitying - ha!  it doesn't help that justin's suggestion for every meal is tex mex, and that he drinks chocolate milk in front of me.  punk. 

boy or girl?: no clue right now.  i'm going to stick with boy, but i have no clue. 
missing the most: i think my lame cravings section does a good job of summarizing this...

pregnancy milestone: tomorrow night is my sprinkle (or sprinkly, as i like to call it).  my girlfriends throw a "light" shower for second babies.  though i'm not 100% wild about this idea (it's really hard for me to accept nice things being done for me), i think it will be really fun.  i wanted it to be as un-baby-shower-like as possible, so we're going to a fun bar/cafe at 8pm and i'm very excited to spend some time chatting with my ladies. 

Sunday, November 11, 2012

31 weeks.


week: 31

baby stats: this week, small smalls is the size of a pineapple or four navel oranges (random).  so, over 16 inches and somewhere around 3.3-3.5 lbs.  baby's irises now react to light, and all five senses are in working order.  s/he is also turning its head as its brain continues to grow.  

aversions/cravings: i eat eggs.  and salads.  

bump: based on my appointment friday, i am measuring about half a week big right now.  but, give or take a few centimeters of fundal height is perfectly normal, says my midwife (and the internet).  i found the belly cast justin and i did of my emme belly at around 36 weeks or so, and it is insane.  this belly is shaped differently and smaller (thankfully) at this point.  we'll see where we end up!  

worries: going to see my practitioners always makes me feel approximately eleventy billion times better.  i cannot even begin to describe how much i love my doc and my midwife.  i don't think i knew a medical experience could be this awesome.  anyway...at friday's appointment, we talked about my gestational diabetes and i got some good guidance.  i'm still bummed/annoyed/worried, but they think i'm doing great and taking good care of myself.  i need to be walking more, so i am going to step that up.  baby is still breech, so i have an appointment with a chiropractor tomorrow to see if we can align my hips in a way that will make this baby happy.  ha.  there's still definitely a chance s/he will flip on its own, but i want to be proactive and do what i can to get this little one head down if at all possible.  if chiropractics don't work, i'll be scheduled for a version around 35 weeks, so that should be interesting....just hoping we get an independent flipper.  other than that, heartbeat, size, etc. all look great and that makes me much calmer in my head.  

boy or girl?: i'm less certain these days.  i am still saying boy because of the breech thing and how uncomfortable i am getting, but who knows, really?  other than my ob, of course.  ha.  

missing the most: chocolate things.  all of the chocolate things.  
pregnancy milestone: tomorrow is the "two months left" mark, at least until my due date.  that is crazy.  when i say "mid-january", it still sounds SO far away, but really it's ridiculously close.  this week, in preparation for family visitors, we got the nursery mostly in order, so i am feeling a little better about that.  still several things to do/inventory, but moving right along and i no longer feel like i have no idea where this kid is going to live.  ha.  

Thursday, November 08, 2012

2 years old.

yesterday, emme turned 2.  i know everyone says this, but of course i really can't believe it.  i am baffled every day by how sweet and wonderful this child is.  she is truly a joy. 

with the time change, she has been waking up earlier, so we first heard her peeping around 6:15.  we listened to her on the monitor for a little bit, mostly because hearing the random stuff she says to her animals is hilarious.  we headed into her bedroom telling her happy birthday.  justin asked how old she was, and she gave the standard reply she's been giving for a while now "i'm almost two!".  so we had to explain to her that she is actually two now. 

anyway...she was really excited that it was her birthday.  we had made mini whole wheat zucchini muffins the night before to share with her class (even though she had to go to bed before they were done baking), and she kept talking about how she was going to bring muffins for her buddies.  what a sweet kid.  we had her two year doctor's appointment at 8:15, so justin and i had planned to take her out to breakfast.  on the way, she got to talk to jj and kk on the phone and they sang happy birthday to her, which she loved. 

we had breakfast at cafe java by our house and ek devoured her eggs, bacon, and pancake.  that kid loves a pancake.  then we headed to the doc.  they were late taking us (and we were a couple minutes late getting there), but she was such a helpful kid while we were there! 

height: 34 inches (50%)
weight: 25 lbs. 14 oz (30%)

she was proud to show the nurse and doctor her "big girl panties" with the cupcake on them for her birthday.  the doc was also really impressed by what a talker she is - haha.  i told her it's a blessing and a curse, although i admit i absolutely LOVE hearing stuff like that about my kiddo.  i also loved that there were no shots at this appointment - only the flu mist, which she didn't mind at all. 

after the doctor, we dropped dad off at home so he could head to work, and i brought ek to school with her muffins.  i got to work from home yesterday (favorite part of my job), and picked her up a little early so we could have a little bit of extra time with her.  justin got off early too and we met at trudy's for an outdoor dinner.  when i asked her whether she wanted a taco or a quesadilla for dinner, she looked at me for a minute and then said, "hmmm, maybe a muffin?". 

dinner was fun and low key.  we headed home where she got to open her presents from us.  she had a card from lolo and g-dad, jj and kk, and from grandpa browne and she liked having us read them all out loud to her.  her big present from us was the quilt i made for her room, but since we gave it to her a couple weeks ago during the cold snap, we had a few other little items as well.  she opened some cutting utensils and her own cutting board so she can help me while cooking, and some popsicle molds.  i had also sewn a diaper out of some extra fabric for her baby doll.  that was the big hit - i don't think she really understood what the other stuff was for, but i think she'll be excited when we chop zucchini tonight!  anyway...she was mostly just fired up to open things. 

the final hurrah for the evening was the singing.  we lit a candle and jb and i serenaded her with happy birthday and let her pick out a piece of halloween candy to eat.  i think that was her favorite part of the day.  we did a quick bath and put on pajamas, then read a few books before time for lights out.  all in all, not the most eventful day, but a good one nonetheless.  it's really nice having a kid who gets excited and enthusiastic about everything. 

i will write a sentimental post about everything happening with her soon - probably after her real birthday party on saturday.  i will also take and subsequently post a two year photo shoot (instead of the 2 iphone photos i took yesterday).  but for now, i wanted to record the big day before too much time passed.  we really love this little monkey. 



Wednesday, November 07, 2012

election day.

at some point tuesday morning, it occurred to me that in 4 more presidential terms (interestingly, the number of presidential elections i have participated in), emme kay will be voting.  i had to look it up, and her 18th birthday, november 7, 2028, will be a tuesday and an election year.  pretty exciting.

justin and i got up early and took emme to the polls to cast our votes.  i try not to get political on the internet, but i follow the issues very closely and have watched this election season with alternating fascination and disgust, and i feel like this is an historical occasion that warrants a blog post.  i'm not that old, but i don't remember a time when everything was so divisive. 

i hold deep convictions about certain issues.  education.  liberty.  protection for those that can't protect themselves.  the environment.  there are others, but i think those are the biggest four.  i believe that economic prosperity stems from a place where these issues are prioritized.   when i look at an election, at our political process, i try to think beyond what my own life and my own current reality are.  i try to think about the future of my children - what kind of world i want them to grow up in.  what kind of people i want them to meet and know.  i try to vote with my heart and with my head.  it is not always easy to do.  i cannot reduce everything i believe into one paradigm or the other - i don't even believe there are only two paradigms to fit within...i can only prioritize those topics that are most relevant and worrisome to me. 

even harder than the actual casting of my vote is dealing with the other humans in the world and their discussions about all this voting, this political-ness.  every member of my extended family, with the exception of maybe one, tends in a different political direction than i do.  every one that i work with leans a different way than i as well.  it's odd, but it makes me feel persecuted in some bizarre way.  it also makes me feel like i have to be quiet and reserved about what i hold to be true and dear, lest family and co-workers think "differently" of me. 

that is not a comfortable position, and it's not one that i relish.  i think of myself as a convicted person who is willing and eager to stand up for what i believe in.  but, in this time of facebook and sound bites, standing up for yourself is a quick and easy way to lose friends and alienate people.  too often, if you even begin a politically-charged sentiment, people assume they understand everything about what you think and why you think it.  i prefer to believe that we are all much, much more complex than that, so i try to stay out of it (publicly). i try to give people who write blanket (and false) statements like "obama is a muslim" the benefit of the doubt. 

obama was never my candidate.  i didn't love him in 2008 and i don't love him today.  do i believe he is the best candidate available right now?  yes.  is the foundation of that belief incredibly complicated and impossible to reduce down to a single issue?  absolutely.  i worry about the environment - will the air we breathe and the water we drink be clean for my children and their children?  i worry about opportunity - will my daughter(s) have access to the same jobs as men at the same pay?  will they be allowed autonomy over their own bodies - free to make the choices that our family morals and values guide them to make, not confined to some edict issued by the government?  i worry about the people we interact with daily - will they be educated?  healthy?  i feel a sense of brotherhood and compassion for my fellow citizens, and i also feel like the whole country is elevated when we raise up the "least of our brothers and sisters".  i worry about the economy, but only as far as i worry about the deep political and philosophical divide among those in power.  i think the economic system is far too complex and interdependent for one man to do much about - the world is different now, and we need to accept that and move on rather than hankering to policies that worked in the early 80s (or never worked at all).  i worry most about education, since i believe it's the foundation of everything - will i be able to afford to send my children to school?  will they have access to teachers who care?  who are not just pawns in some ridiculous union battle?  will college be affordable and attainable for them?  for their peers and friends?  i worry about safety - when money talks, how do those without it make people listen?  children, single mothers, the elderly - who is looking out for these groups when the government is looking out for corporations?   i worry about the rest of the world - we live in a completely different reality than what existed even 10-15 years ago...are we getting on board with that reality?  are we set up for success and peace among the international community? 

at the end of the day, these were just a few of the concerns that factored in to my vote.  i'm glad that obama won, but i don't think he's the answer.  i think there is a lot of work to do.  i find it interesting that some of the political opposition have said that obama did nothing over the last four years, but simultaneously believe he is capable of completely destroying everything good and pure in the universe in the next four.  one cannot be useless and all-powerful at the same time.  i also think the hyperbole around the destruction of our country and the blatant misinformation from mainstream news media is terrifying.  these are strange times, but i am hopeful that we can all take a minute to check our motives and our biases and decide to work together for the good of the whole.  after all, i've got kids to raise in this great land...

Monday, November 05, 2012

30 weeks.

week: 30


baby stats: baby is the size of a cucumber or a head of cabbage this week, which is funny because i would consider each of those bits of produce smaller than the squashes of last week, but whatever.  we're probably near the 3 pound mark and in the 16-inch range, although all of these things are relative at this point, i think.  more brain development and fat accumulation are happening, and his/her vision is improving. 
aversions/cravings: nothing, really.  since i am being so careful about what i eat now, food is not in any way fun or exciting.  it is purely utilitarian. 
bump: the bump itself seems pretty normal, but i am getting less comfortable.  harder time sleeping, and i'm really achy in my lower abdomen.  still, i really really can't complain.  this pregnancy has taken it pretty easy on me. 
worries: my mental state hasn't been the best this week.  i'm trying really hard to keep a great attitude, and i can maintain it for a little while and then i get all wrung out again.  sigh.  i seriously have nothing to complain about, but i hate this gestational diabetes thing.  it makes me feel like a failure.  i am (still) not loving my job and i just feel like i have so much i want/need to be doing that i am just not doing.  instead of this being a challenge to me (which is how i usually like to think of such things), i just feel defeated and am nervous and anxious about everything that's not happening.  it's really counter-productive.  i also don't have a child care plan for small smalls for when i go back to work, so i am stupidly worried about that.  anyway...in general, i have all this stuff on my mind that is very unrelated to this actual baby, and that isn't cool since i want to be thinking about what a sweet little bundle we're expecting, becoming a family of four, etc. etc.  
looking forward to: emme kay's second birthday party this weekend!  holidays.  slowing it down (ha ha ha.).  doctor's appointment this week. finding out if small smalls has flipped. 
boy or girl?: boy...or girl.  this week i really have no clue.  i think that means i need to re-center and focus on the important things. 

missing the most: not thinking so much about what i'm eating.  
 
pregnancy milestone: we just completed our last weekend of travel before the bebe.  yay!  we were in kansas this weekend to celebrate my mother in-law's 60th birthday, and we won't be taking another overnight adventure until after we have two kiddos.  thanksgiving is super busy and i have some work stuff that will prevent me from fully relishing the holiday, so we're staying in tejas.  and, i'll be almost 38 weeks giant for christmas, so it's probably a good idea to stick close to home.  in any case, though i will miss having thanksgiving with my parents, i am really really excited about "owning" both holidays this year.  i don't expect to go all out, necessarily, but i'm sure we will do a few things to make it special for ekb.   
 
here is a quick video from this weekend.  there's a drive-thru starbuck's really close to jb's mom's house, so we took emme there both mornings we were in town.  she had her first ever hot cocoa and i think it's fair to say she loved it.  i asked for a single pump of mocha so it wasn't so intensely sweet, but she was very serious about getting every last drop, and drank the whole thing down in what felt like a matter of seconds.  
 
 
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