30 weeks.

week: 30

baby stats: baby is the size of a cucumber or a head of cabbage this week, which is funny because i would consider each of those bits of produce smaller than the squashes of last week, but whatever.  we're probably near the 3 pound mark and in the 16-inch range, although all of these things are relative at this point, i think.  more brain development and fat accumulation are happening, and his/her vision is improving. 

aversions/cravings: nothing, really.  since i am being so careful about what i eat now, food is not in any way fun or exciting.  it is purely utilitarian. 

bump: the bump itself seems pretty normal, but i am getting less comfortable.  harder time sleeping, and i'm really achy in my lower abdomen.  still, i really really can't complain.  this pregnancy has taken it pretty easy on me. 

worries: my mental state hasn't been the best this week.  i'm trying really hard to keep a great attitude, and i can maintain it for a little while and then i get all wrung out again.  sigh.  i seriously have nothing to complain about, but i hate this gestational diabetes thing.  it makes me feel like a failure.  i am (still) not loving my job and i just feel like i have so much i want/need to be doing that i am just not doing.  instead of this being a challenge to me (which is how i usually like to think of such things), i just feel defeated and am nervous and anxious about everything that's not happening.  it's really counter-productive.  i also don't have a child care plan for small smalls for when i go back to work, so i am stupidly worried about that.  anyway...in general, i have all this stuff on my mind that is very unrelated to this actual baby, and that isn't cool since i want to be thinking about what a sweet little bundle we're expecting, becoming a family of four, etc. etc.  

looking forward to: emme kay's second birthday party this weekend!  holidays.  slowing it down (ha ha ha.).  doctor's appointment this week. finding out if small smalls has flipped. 

boy or girl?: boy...or girl.  this week i really have no clue.  i think that means i need to re-center and focus on the important things. 

missing the most: not thinking so much about what i'm eating.  

 

pregnancy milestone: we just completed our last weekend of travel before the bebe.  yay!  we were in kansas this weekend to celebrate my mother in-law's 60th birthday, and we won't be taking another overnight adventure until after we have two kiddos.  thanksgiving is super busy and i have some work stuff that will prevent me from fully relishing the holiday, so we're staying in tejas.  and, i'll be almost 38 weeks giant for christmas, so it's probably a good idea to stick close to home.  in any case, though i will miss having thanksgiving with my parents, i am really really excited about "owning" both holidays this year.  i don't expect to go all out, necessarily, but i'm sure we will do a few things to make it special for ekb.   

 

here is a quick video from this weekend.  there's a drive-thru starbuck's really close to jb's mom's house, so we took emme there both mornings we were in town.  she had her first ever hot cocoa and i think it's fair to say she loved it.  i asked for a single pump of mocha so it wasn't so intensely sweet, but she was very serious about getting every last drop, and drank the whole thing down in what felt like a matter of seconds.