some days.

this morning i got up when liga knocked on the door.  this is not the first time that has happened.  i turned the alarm off at some hour after pressing snooze twice (i tell myself in my head that i don't want the alarm to wake the baby, but let's be honest i am dying for just a few more minutes of sleep).  i stumbled into the bathroom and noticed the creepy vein that's bulging out of my eye is still there.  it's not super noticeable, other than to me, but i see it.  justin doesn't want to look at it because he's grossed out by "things in eyes", but it's there and it's creepy.  i showered and then spilt breast milk on the counter trying to prepare emme's bottles for the day.  i nursed her when she woke up (25 minutes after us) and was rewarded with spit up on my clean shirt, which i half-heartedly mopped up with a soggy burp cloth and then promptly left on.  after managing to finish clothing myself in something resembling work-appropriate, i poured a mug of coffee and made it out the door.  5 blocks away from the house, i remembered i had left my wallet in the stroller yesterday, so i turned around to get it, in the process spilling coffee all over the center console and all the pens/receipts/orange peels that make their home there.
when i made it to work, i realized (after parking at the opposite end of the parking lot) i'd forgotten my id badge, so i had to walk to new jersey to get the security guard to let me in.  he made a joke about it that i completely didn't catch - what happened to my quick wit?  since getting to work, i forgot 2 different meetings and forgot to pump for an hour more than i was supposed to, leaving me with only 2 sessions for that today.  tomorrow's calendar looks like a hot mess of blue activities to complete, so i am scrambling to get ahead on a day when i am only falling more and more behind.  i promise i will get it together again one day.