it was a dark and stormy night.

last night, jb and i were couch lounging post-dinner, watching the spurs/heat game (side note: i hate lebron james).  we kept seeing tornado and thunderstorm warnings for counties west and north of us.  the weather people said we should be on the lookout in travis county too, but we sort of ignored that because the weather people are always wrong with central texas weather.  especially when they say we're likely to get any form of precipitation - ha!

anyway...i dozed off for about 15-20 minutes, and when i woke up from my couch nap around 10, it was pouring buckets and the wind was insane.  there was also near-constant lightning and a low rumble of thunder.  jb and i stood in the back door to the porch and watched the spectacle.  i really love a good storm. and no, of course i don't love when people or property get hurt, but i can't help but get really amazed at the forces of nature at work.

so, next thing we know, the electricity is gone. at nearly that moment, we hear a huge crack, and one of our elm trees split in half. super bummer on so many levels. definitely another $500-$700 we didn't need to be spending right now, but what can you do? i think we'll lose the whole tree, too, which i hate because that one provided awesome kiddie pool shade during the afternoon.

the postscript to this story is that ek woke up about 5 minutes later. i think the lack of white noise from our a/c, her fan, her little noise-making vent thing, plus the addition of thunder noise and lightning cracks woke her up, and then she was in a super dark room all alone. poor kiddo. hollis, on the other hand, had the best night of sleep of his entire life. literally. i was up most of the night because i had a 3.5 year old monkey in bed with me and it was hot, but i got up for real around 6:15. by 6:45 i couldn't stand it, so went in to h's room to check on him because he's NEVER slept that late. he was racked out, but of course woke up immediately when the door creaked. sigh. maybe he's turned over a new leaf?

'nana.

hollis can take down an entire banana in approximately 3-4 bites.  this is not an exaggeration.  he also wakes up every morning and begins chanting "NANA!" throughout the house immediately after nursing.  don't try cutting the banana into reasonable sized pieces, though.  he won't touch those.

whole30.

a whole lot and not very much has been happening lately.  these are always the weirdest times for me - when i feel busy (albeit not overwhelmed), but there's not anything specifically going on like an event or a definitive project or whatever.

justin and i decided to start/try/dabble in the whole30/paleo eating this month.  it's been going amazingly well so far.  i don't like diets (duh), but i love food and science and the complex interaction between our bodies and what we put in them.  i'm definitely not the healthiest eater as a general rule.  i am a big over-consumer...i don't really have an off-button, especially when certain foods are involved.  foods like chips and salsa (hello, i live in texas).  bread.  cheese.  butter.  crackers.

but!  there is hope, i think.  because i do love vegetables.  like, i really love them.  more than fruits, for sure.  and you sprinkle a little salt on 'em and saute or roast them in coconut oil and i'm a happy camper.

anyway.  there were a few reasons for us to work on this conscientious eating shift.  first, our energy levels haven't been the greatest.  mine have been better because of the working out, but definitely with the heat of summertime upon us, i need to ward off the lethargy.  second, our kids were pretty good about vegetables, but lately they've been struggling a little bit - preferring toast and cheerios and other low-nutrient foods.  so, this helps have veggies around all the time, which should lead to them eating more of them, ultimately.  third, we were in a pattern of eating out a ton, which is terrible for our health and our wallet.  and finally, there's the whole over-consumption, can't-say-no thing i have with food.  i wanted to see what i could do about breaking the psychological attachment i have to what i eat, so i'm giving it a whirl.

the rules are pretty simple.  real, whole foods.  no grains, legumes, dairy, or booze.  focus on veggies, protein, and healthy fats.  i was most concerned about drinking my coffee black, but it's actually been totally fine!  i brew it a little bit weaker than usual so it's not so intense, but i normally drink it with only cream, so the taste isn't too extremely different.  i was also concerned about cheese, since i adore cheese and find it to be an easy, delicious go-to protein/fat source.  i don't think i have issues tolerating dairy (especially cheese), but so far it hasn't been bad to not have it.  the hardest part so far has been the evenings...my energy levels haven't ramped back up (supposedly, after day 7 or so, your energy levels become amazing...but the detox beforehand is not energy-inducing), so i am sleepy after we get the kidlets down and really want some chocolate or a glass of wine.  or both.  ha.  anyway...i've managed to hold off for now, so that's good.

what we do eat is amazingly delicious, and this week we've eaten breakfast and dinner as a family every day, which is SO nice.  morning meals are eggs and veggies with a little fruit - this morning, we had eggs scrambled in coconut oil with sauteed baby bok choy and half a kiwi.  delicious.  mid-day meals are usually a salad of some sort.  the best one from this week was our tuesday salad: baby spinach and arugula with leftover salmon, roasted peppers, roasted beets, roasted zucchini & squash, avocado, pistachios, and a drizzle of olive oil.  the beets were so tasty!  for the evening meal, it's the same, basically: last night was chicken with a sundried tomato/balsamic/garlic deglaze and carrots, zucchini and yellow squash roasted with garlic olive oil and sea salt.  not too shabby.

i am still offering the kids some grains and cheese sometimes.  for example, they both LOVE fresh mozz, so i keep that around and let them snack on it.  they also love rice cakes, and get those at school during snack a lot, and i'm obviously totally fine with that.

my hope is that after these few weeks/month or so, we are all feeling really great and have tried lots of different foods.  i fully intend to reintroduce some things and see how they work after a while off, but maybe i'll feel so incredible after this time that i'll never need to keep cheezits in the house again!

the story about the chair.

when justin and i got married, we got a lot of gift certificates to crate&barrel.  after our wedding and honeymoon, we piled them all up and headed to the store and picked out a chair.  it was red and a really cool woven fabric and it was symbolic of our new union - the first piece of furniture we bought as a married couple.

i'm sentimental.

within a matter of days/weeks/months, our cat pippa had basically destroyed the chair.  she had claws, and no matter how much we covered the chair with blankets, sprayed her with a water bottle when she was on it, or any other act of terrorism towards her, she was hell-bent on clawing that chair.  apparently, she really liked the weave too.

here's the thing.  we knew the chair was in bad shape, and getting worse.  but...i am terrible about buying furniture.  a) i'm picky b) i'm indecisive and c) i'm really really averse to spending large sums of money (and justin is really really averse to cheap things).  so, the chair just sat in our house, then moved with us to another house.  then another.  six years, give or take.  that's a long time for a busted chair.  at some point, my mom had apologized to guests on our behalf for the state of our chair enough that i couldn't take it anymore, so i started to see about options to reupholster it.  the bones of the chair were still fine, it just needed some fresh new fabric and maybe a little sprucing on the stuffing.

i got several quotes in excess of $750.  that was not including fabric, which could range anywhere from $50-$450.  yikes!  as i said before, i have a hard time spending large sums of money, and to spend a lot of money to fix an expensive chair seemed like one of those fool-me-once scenarios.  i thought there HAD to be a better way.

side note: i really REALLY want to learn to reupholster and i feel like i would like doing it, but i don't have the time or room to learn right now, and this is a more advanced project than i would be ready for (or so i rationalized).

enter needto.com.  i heard about needto on the radio - it's a local startup that connects people who need jobs with people who need jobs done.  i thought this would be incredible - i could give someone some work and get something done, and ideally pay a more reasonable amount for the whole thing.  win win.

so i posted my "need" and i offered $400 for the job (minus fabric, which i was going to acquire for myself).  i thought that was reasonable, but hoped for competitive offers to get it for me for less.  i got a lot of offers - probably 10-12, which was great.  one of the most compelling was from a guy - let's call him zach.  zach said he had a degree in industrial design and set decoration, had lots of tools and experience, and that he's easily be able to do the job for $250.  perfect, right?

this is where things start to go awry.  the last weekend of january, justin was traveling for work.  i arranged to meet zach near his bicycle shop downtown.  i loaded up the kids and the chair and the fabric and texted him when i arrived.  he came to my car, got the chair and fabric, and said he'd be in touch.  i told him not to worry about timing too much, since we'd been dealing with a busted chair for 6 years, and he said he'd be done within 3-4 weeks.

in early march, i sent him a facebook message asking how it was going and i got no response.  i sent a follow up message a day or two later and he apologized profusely, said he had injured his hand a couple of times, but that he was making progress and should be done by sxsw (end of march).  i said fine with me, just let me know.

sxsw comes and goes and i hear nothing.  i reach out to him via email, facebook message, phone, and text in early to mid april and i get no response from anything at all.  justin and i begin to suspect we're never going to see our chair again, and i realize we have no recourse and start mentally berating myself for making the terrible decision to trust anything peer-to-peer.  in a desperate attempt to do something/anything, i reach out to needto.com directly with my issue.

i get a response from a guy at needto.  let's call him wade.  wade is apologetic and assures me this has never happened to another client ever before.  he says he plans to make it right and will do everything he can to get our chair back for us.

i should say at this point that i gave zach no fewer than 10 opportunities to walk away from the project all together.  in one fit of desperation, i even offered to pay him JUST to get my chair back (reupholstered or not).  no response to any of it, ever.

anyway.  wade and i go back and forth several times over email.  he employs social media and whatever other sleuthing skills he's got to try to track zach down.  the best luck he has is through a mutual facebook friend of his and zach's who agrees to contact zach and try to get a response.  the gist of that conversation was basically that:

• zach is some sort of stalker (according to the mutual friend person)
• he had nearly completed the chair, but had been super depressed because one of his friends was critically injured in the sxsw accident
• he and his girlfriend were down to one phone which is why he hadn't been in touch
• he would contact us that night/that weekend and arrange for pick up that weekend free of charge for everything he'd put us through

needless to say, none of those promises came to fruition.  i emailed wade to let him know we were still chairless and incommunicado with zach.  he said it was his personal mission to get our chair back (finished or not at this point was moot).  i gave him zach's work address, home address, and all other contact info i had for him.  

and then...silence.  i sent a couple of emails asking for status/if he'd had any luck.  no response.  i sent a facebook message to zach's girlfriend, apologizing for contacting her, but asking if she could help intervene.  she responded, but was not helpful and never replied again.  

so this week, i get a suggestion from facebook for needto.com.  in my frustration, i gave them a one-star review and said something along the lines of "good business idea.  bad business when your worker steals your stuff.".  i could have been much snarkier, but i try to tone such things down on the internet.  

lo and behold, this morning an email pops up from wade.  it has been 37 days since he last wrote to me.  this is a direct copy/paste because it's amazing:

Just wanted to give you an update, was waiting to just bring it to you but, still don't have it. Here's the deal, Zach, is all coked out and a thief, got fired 2 months ago for stealing at {business name}. He still is in Austin and one of his house mates still rides so trying to contact her. Talked to detective last week and he suggested filing a charge on him.  I'm still waiting to find out where he lives and just go there. What ever we need to do to make it right because Zach is not a representative of the thousands of awesome helpers on the site.

so here we are.  over four months later, and my helper is a cokehead who stole a beat up chair from people who would willingly give him money just to get their own property back.  i can honestly say this is the most bizarre situation i've found myself in in recent memory.  i'm weirded out, frustrated, angry, and a little bit scared.  do i press charges against this guy?  i don't want to get in to some sort of crazy legal situation over this.  i just want my chair back.  

17 months.

yesterday, my baby turned 17 months old.  whoosh that was fast.  i haven't done monthly posts for him since his birthday (and even his first year, i wasn't super awesome), but i feel like there is just SO much going on with him right now.  the language explosion is amazing and right underneath the surface.  just last night, jb was saying "that dude doesn't say much, but he understands EVERYTHING".  which is really true for him.  he is saying more and more every day, even if his articulation isn't fantastic yet, but his comprehension is incredible.  he follows multi-step directions and is usually really responsive when you ask him or communicate with him.  he's still a toddler, for sure, but surprisingly reasonable for a toddler.  ha.

physical/motor: hollis is a short duder.  i haven't measured him since his last doctors' appointment (and thankfully we haven't had one since his 15 month well child visit!), but seeing him next to other kidlets makes me notice what a shrimp he is.  ek grows just like that, too, though, so i am not worried.  she will not move an inch for nearly a year, then shoot up 4-5 inches in a couple of months.  he's also feeling denser when i carry him lately, so maybe he's primed for a little growth spurt.  his feet are still little empanadas and he's in a size 4/4.5 in shoes mostly because of his foot chub.  molars are all in (not fully, but through), and the front 8 are there too.  in terms of motor skills, he's trying to run/walk with purpose a little bit and it's super cute.  he's definitely more interested in the gross motor stuff right now, and has less patience with fine motor activities, though he'll give them a little bit of effort before getting super frustrated.

food/sleep: oh this baby and his sleep.  we've made some progress here, and i think that we have a lot of potential.  he has had multiple nights where he's slept past 6am, and he's consistently going down and staying down until at least 4:30, so that is great.  i am still nursing him before bed and in the mornings, and i think that is a huge part of why he's waking up so early.  i'm just not ready to wean him yet, and i'm ok with that.  before bed, we do bath and jammies, then i nurse him in the living room or ek's room, then we head into his bedroom for a couple of books and a song before lights out.  this routine is far superior to my nurse-to-sleep routine of over 15 months.  woops.  putting himself to sleep has been huge for both of us.
on the food side, hollis eats everything or nothing.  as with most things in his life, he is not ambivalent.  some mornings (at least two mornings this week), he will eat two whole bananas plus whatever other fruit or cheerios or whatever we put in front of him.  other meals (like dinner this past monday), he won't touch a thing and will squawk at you for daring to offer him food.  he's not nearly as adventurous/willing to try stuff as emme was/is, but we'll work on him.  and, honestly, i can't complain - he is still a great eater.  his preferences are: fruit, cheese, toast, any other type of bread, and stuff that is whole.  he gets annoyed when i break things up into bite-sized pieces.

likes/dislikes: the book thing.  ohmygosh.  hollis is obsessed with books and they are everywhere in our house.  everywhere.  he is especially fond of any book with a dog in it, or really any animals/noisemaking things (like trucks).  he's super into making sounds these days - animal sounds and vroooom especially.  he also loves drumming, splashing in water, trying to screw on bottle tops/sippy cup lids, being outside, climbing stuff, and balls.  emme is still pretty much his favorite person ever (although he really really likes me and justin too).  he loves to give hugs and kisses and is a super affectionate, cuddly dude.
he does not like: diaper changes, food he doesn't recognize, being strapped in to anything, being asked to sit down/sit still for meals.  he gets super focused on something and will definitely lose his temper if you try to move him from it or don't give it to him quickly enough (in the case of books he can't reach).

i guess hollis is really a very typical toddler - big emotions, big developments in a little body.  i think he's delicious and delightful and just about the most hilarious and adorable creature i've ever seen, but i'm probably a little bit biased.

first dance recital.

ek's dance recital was on saturday and it was hilarious.  she started dance a few months ago, but i don't think it really clicked for her that the culmination of that activity was a performance on stage.  last week, we had parents' observation in her class.  she barely danced at all - mostly she looked at us and looked at herself in the mirror and kind of flopped around.  i was not optimistic about the amount of legit dancing we would see come recital time.

the dress rehearsal was a trip.  it was from 4-6 on a friday afternoon (side note: how are there this many women who DON'T work?  what year is this?), so i worked from home earlier in the day, then grabbed the kidlets from school, battled traffic to round rock, wrestled a sweaty emme into her costume, bribed her with lipstick, then deposited her in a dark theatre solo.  whew.  i didn't realize beforehand (communications were not the best) that she would have to be in the auditorium without me, so i didn't get to pre-wire her at all.  stuff like that freaks her out, plus she was super duper freaked out to go up on stage.  my kid is not the ham that some kids are, that's for sure.

anyway…hollis and i wandered around the performing arts center, reading the same three books about 492 times until i was allowed to grab her.  fortunately, that was at around 5:!5, so she didn't have to stay the full 2 hours.  she was bright eyed when she got out of the theatre - seeing the "big girls" dance, seeing everyone else's costume, the lights and darkness - it was pretty cute.  i asked her how she felt being up on stage and she informed me that she didn't go.  i guess she got upset when she got her leg stuck in the chair in the audience, so she sat on some adult's lap and didn't go up when it was her class's turn.

so i was not optimistic about her actually dancing on saturday.  when we got there, it was total chaos.  i'd had to wake both hollis and emme up from 3+ hour naps to make it on time, and there were zillions of families and kids everywhere.  it was a bit overwhelming, and none of us had had lunch!  fortunately, i brought a boatload of cheerios, so they were able to have a pre-recital snack.  em did better when i dropped her at the green room, but she was still a little freaked out.  hollis and i found a seat and waited for the show to begin.

emme's class went on 5th and it was fairly adorable.  she didn't do much dancing right at first, but then she tried a few moves and smiled and did her thing.  she's at least 2-3 months younger than the youngest kid in her class (they were all supposed to be three before the end of august and she's a november birthday), so i didn't feel badly that the nearly-five year-olds were much more focused than she was.  i was just SO proud that she got up on the stage and so so excited that jb made it in time to see her.  she applauded at the end of her performance, which i thought was super cute - i just know she was so relieved to have made it through.

they didn't allow videos in the performance, and i haven't decided if we're going to buy the DVD yet or not, but i snapped a few pics of them snacking before the show, and we got a couple more shots afterward, before she changed out of her costume in the middle of the parking lot.

reemerging.

man, a week sure does go by in a hurry.  this past one was a blur for many reasons.

two weeks ago, justin's uncle was killed in a car accident.  he was 56 and driving his son home from college when another driver veered over the center line, clipped his truck, and he flipped.  both his son and the other driver emerged with minor scratches, but brian was pronounced dead at the scene.  needless to say, this was a very tragic accident.  brian and marilyn were super close, and brian's kids have lost three grandparents and their father in the last year.  things like this always make me realize how fragile and precious life is - nothing is certain and it's a good reminder not to take even the most mundane bits of life for granted.

the kids and i weren't able to attend the services, but justin flew up and got to spend a few days with his family.  while he was gone, the kids and i handled up on emme's dress rehearsal for her dance recital, whole foods, and some serious park time.  emme's favorite spot to eat after school on fridays is the whole foods up north (near their school), but i have a feeling we'll be looking for a new spot now that it's crazy hot and we'll be at a new school in july.  anyway...she devoured 6 or 7 stuffed grape leaves for dinner that night.  it makes me irrationally happy that my kids eat things like grape leaves.  also, hollis defaults to playing peekaboo at all times right now.  when he sees you see him, he immediately covers his eyes (or at least one of them) and then flashes a big grin when he reveals himself.

justin got home saturday and drove straight from the airport to ek's dance recital.  he skidded in right as her performance was starting, which was magical.  even though it was short and pretty anti-climactic, i'm so glad we both got to watch her up on stage.  i'll write a separate post about that.

sunday we went on a mission to get furniture for our patio project, which is nearing completion (!!!!).  apparently, children love to go into large containers.  we may need to invest in some sort of decorative box for them.

weekend review.

i love holiday weekends.  this one was particularly busy and fun because the kids were off school on friday, my parents and brother came into town, and we had wedding festivities for our friends michael and kalli all weekend.

friday i stayed home with the kids and brought them to the splash pad (or just "the splash" as ek calls it) with some friends from school.  super fun.  we got home right after noon and my fam arrived at the same time we did, so that was super fun.  jb got home from work and he and i got ready and headed down to town lake for a bat cruise/rehearsal dinner.  super fun.  austin is pretty.

saturday, jb did some wedding stuff in the morning while i hung out with the kids and my family.  when they went down for naps, mom, joe and i got out for a bit so i could get a mani/pedi (this NEVER happens) and they could do a little shopping.  then jb and i headed out for a cocktail party and night at a hotel.  we pretended like we were 24 again and had a hotel room for the night.  if i were smart, i would have just gone to bed at like 8 and gotten 14 hours of uninterrupted sleep.  apparently, i'm not that smart.  but, we had a blast.

sunday we got home and i took ek to disney on ice with alison and cameron.  she was a little freaked out about it - it was loud and dark and occurred during nap time - but she hung in there for the whole show and was wide-eyed when telling the rest of the family about it when we got home.

the wedding was sunday evening at a restaurant called green pastures and it was very nice.  great band, good food, lovely venue.

thankfully, monday was stormy, so after my family headed out, we built a fort in the middle of the living room and were lazy all day.  it is extremely rare that i have a day with zero productivity, but monday was one of those days and i loved every minute of it.  ek was a little cranky, as she was still sleep-deprived from her fun weekend, but she held it together as well as she could.

i want four-day weekends every week.

lists.

i have a lot of lists.  on paper, yes, but mostly in my brain.  lists of projects i want to start or complete, ideas for short stories i never write, stuff i need to pick up at the grocery store, recipes to invent, stuff i want to do before i die, songs that i should download and put on a hypothetical running mix, restaurants i'd like to try, books i want to read.  the list goes on - a list of lists.

i've been in a pretty good place mentally lately, i think.  it's hard for me to admit when i'm not in a good mental place, even though i'm also pretty sure it's obvious when that is the case.  i have a hard time with self-care of all kinds.  but.  i've been exercising semi-consistently (at least 3 times a week) for several weeks now.  it has helped tremendously with my B factor.  as in, i'm way less of a B.  i think.  or, i feel like less of a B.  anyway.  this is the first time in my life i'm completely willing to admit that there is something behind this alleged science of workouts/energy/positivity/etc.  so i guess this means i have to keep it up.

the other thing that's been helping tremendously is that i've been reading peaceful parents, happy kids by dr. laura markham.  and also her website, aha parenting.  i mean, whoa.  i haven't become some exceptional parent overnight.  but her writing and advice is so actionable and logical to me.  my yelling has diminished precipitously over the last several weeks, which is creating this amazing feedback loop where the kids aren't as buck-wild and i don't beat myself up all the time and then get more strung out because i'm such a terrible mom and then rinse, repeat.  it's really changed my life ALREADY...and we're only a couple weeks in.  AND i only got jb to finally read, like, one article a few days ago.  and that has made another huge difference.  emme is like a different child, blossoming in this glow of acceptance and play and empathy.  it's remarkable.

so now if we can only figure out how to get hollis to sleep past 4am...

princess.

this morning i had to take all the animals to the vet for check-ups and because pippa the cat is having a bladder issue.  we don't have a pet carrier for her anymore, so i brought her in a picnic basket, which the kids thought was hilarious.

anyway...after dropping them off, ek was asking lots of questions about vets and why the pets were there and what the vet would do to them, etc.  i told her that it was a neat job and maybe she could be a vet when she grows up if she wants to.

ek: i don't want to be a vet when i grow up.
me: oh no?  well what do you want to be?
ek: a princess.
me: (trying not to be too judgey because she is 3, after all) oh...well what do you do if you're a princess?
ek: twirl.

touche, kid.  touche.

moments later she told me she really wants to be a dog when she grows up so she can run around at the park with no parents.

almost the weekend.

starting on tuesday afternoon, i felt like it was almost the weekend, so this was a pretty long week.  not bad (at all - actually quite good in many ways!), just slow.  i wish the weekends and evenings and holidays felt as slow as my work days do.

anyway...random things:

we lose hollis a lot.  not really, but there are many times where we realize we haven't heard from him in several minutes.  independent second child, bless his heart.  almost always, we discover him holed up in his room reading books.  i won't pretend this doesn't make me intensely happy, especially since i don't feel like he's gotten the quality reading time his big sister got from me.

the weather here has been unbelievable this spring.  it's normally into the 90s and even 100s by this point in may, but i wore a FLEECE to drop of the kids yesterday morning.  because it was 47.  in may.  in texas.  i snapped a pic of this on wednesday because it was so pristine and then it was even crisper on thursday.  i know it won't last much longer but ooooh i will enjoy it while it lasts.

last night i perfected my roasting of spaghetti squash.  i learned a couple of secrets that made a huge difference that i will share in case anyone else loves spaghetti squash like i do:

• just chop off the ends before you cut it in half lengthwise.  don't ask me why i haven't thought of this before, but it made a HUGE difference in me not nearly chopping my fingers off.  
• scoop out the seeds then rub a little olive oil and salt and pepper on the flesh of the squash.
• put the flesh side DOWN in the roasting pan - i've done this both ways and the flesh down makes for less watery squash.  
• roast for longer than you think you might need to - i have always done like 40 minutes for medium sized ones, but you really need more like 50 minutes.  and on 400, not 375.  this makes the squash more tender and way way way more delicious.  
• have your kidlet help you scoop out the flesh with a fork (after it's cooled down a bit).  this will make them want to taste it and then they will like it and actually eat their WHOLE plate of spaghetti squash with shrimp and spinach.  

recipe for our yummy dinner last night:

• roast spaghetti squash; separate the meat from the skin
• in a large saute pan, saute shrimp in a little olive or coconut oil
• add salt, pepper, garlic granules, and dill to taste
• throw in handfuls of baby spinach and stir around until it gets all wilty.  don't be scared to put lots of spinach and add more seasoning if you need to
• dump all your spaghetti squash in there to combine and mingle flavors
• add a pat of butter and more dill (if you want, because let's be honest, more dill is always a good idea)
• serve with a little salad or crusty bread or just by itself - top with a little shredded parmesan or goat cheese for extra deliciousness

thank you elsa.

for helping my child to love braids so now i can braid her wispy feather hair and keep it (mostly) out of her face.

jb loves pinterest.

i didn't write about all the stuff we actually did on mother's day.  it was a good day.  we're in the process of re-doing our back porch - painting, cleaning, new screens, new doors.  we're doing most of it ourselves, but we have a guy that's going to put the actual screens on for us, since that part is wily and requires a level of expertise we don't possess (and/or a learning curve we're not willing to put up with).  but, pretty much everything else we're doing.  screen dude said he was going to come to our house tuesday, so we basically had the weekend to wrangle the whole project.

let me just offer an aside about how amazing it is that productivity begets productivity.  in general, we collapse on the couch at 830 or 9 at night after doing just the things that have to be done - lunches packed, dishwasher loaded, diapers stuffed.  but when we manage to start accomplishing things...it's like it gets addictive and we do more and more.  i love that.  it reminds me of what life was like before we were waking up throughout the night with small humans.  ha.

anyway...the point of this post was mother's day stuff.  jb made a fantastic brunch for me - eggs benedict, bacon, hashbrowns, and oj.  he's a really good cook.  but, since the adult brunch took some time to prepare, he whipped up a little platter of snacks for the kiddos so they wouldn't turn into gremlins, which they are wont to do when hungry.  clearly someone has been sneaking around on pinterest when i'm not looking...

mother's day 2014.

my first mother's day as a mother was the day after emme turned 6 months old, and the first day she ever sat up independently.  it's crazy to think about all that has happened in just these few short years of mothering.

being a mom has been the best, hardest, most rewarding, most nerve-wracking, most intense, most joyful, most exhausting thing i've ever done.  i love it, even though i feel super inadequate most of the time.  it's a struggle sometimes to give myself the space and patience to grow and evolve as a person and as a mother.  i'm working on allowing myself to be on the journey.  i feel so honored that i get to do this, in spite of my shortcomings.

we didn't take any pictures of me and the kids this weekend, but here are the most recent pics i snapped of kidlets with my phone.  hollis has a plastic cake dome on his head from a birthday celebration friday.  and ek has intense bedhead with her hot cocoa.  i love these littles.

asparagus.

last night i steam asparagus for dinner.  it's not as good as roasted asparagus, especially when it's over-steamed and kind of stringy.  but, you put enough butter on anything and it's a-ok.

emme: "mommy, are you eating that spruce goose?"

3.5.

this girl turned three-and-a-half yesterday.  i love half birthdays, but i love ek even more.  i'm so lucky to be her mom.

little bro at 16 months.

hollis turned 16 months old sunday!  and my first thought was "this is how old i was when my parents had my brother".  and my second thought was "they were crazy people".  not really, but that is a close age gap.

anyway.  my baby is not a baby anymore.  i mean, he is and he isn't and it's amazing and devastating and all the other emotions.  just like most things with this little parenthood journey.

people always say things like "i couldn't imagine our lives without him", and even though it's super trite, i agree times a million.  hollis is such a part of our family and we adore him.

i will get the rough stuff out of the way first.  this kid.  does not.  sleep.  that's not entirely true, as i've had many friends/acquaintances who've had kids who really REALLY don't sleep.  but man.  i don't think we've had a full night of solid sleep ever in this dude's life.  it was better for a little while, but he's back to waking up at 4:30 or earlier now.  every night.  last week there were many nights with a visit at 1:30 or earlier.  last night he was up pretty much hourly.  i think he's cutting molars maybe?  but i also think i've been making one excuse or another for him in this department since he was born, and the reality is just...he's not a great sleeper.  yet.  his naps have really come around and now he is pretty solid the vast majority of days, so it gives me hope!  but if anyone has any magical tips/tricks on how to get a super busy toddler to settle down and sleep 12 hours, i would be your best best friend.  i hate crying it out (though i've tried), and i'm not really ready to wean him yet (nor is he), but i don't know what else to do...he is waking up ek and then she's in our bed too and really...sleep is important, man.

the other thing is that hollis has a short fuse.  he has quite a little temper and is stubborn and strong-willed (i know this is shocking to hear, since no one else in our family fits this description...ha).  he's also not super verbal yet, so he gets WAY frustrated and he will tell you about it.  by being in a rage.  it's almost funny, but it's also frustrating for us as we're trying to wrangle him and his demanding big sister and all.the.things.  of course.  it doesn't help that he is LOUD.  like, the loudest baby of all time ever.  and when he's mad he's just so so so mad.

but. the rest of the time, hollis is the most hilarious, charming, darling boy.  he will toddle to wherever you are and insist that you read a book to him right then.  his laugh is infectious and profuse and the most joyous sound in our household.  his animal sounds (horse, cat and dog are the only consistent ones right now) are so funny - he doesn't do the n in neigh, so it kind of sounds like he's giggling, and his cat is just MAO.  he has seven teeth in the front and i think a couple of molars are trying to join the party on the right side, but he rarely lets me stick my fingers in there.  he loves to brush his teeth, loves to take baths, and adores his sister beyond belief.  he's become a much pickier eater than i anticipated.  he will always eat bread or cheerios or berries, but everything else is hit or miss.  he's surprisingly gentle (for a boy, especially, from what i've heard) - he is super sweet to the dogs and gives amazing cuddles.  he is immediately happy if he's outside or has access to water that he can splash everywhere.  he loves music and frequently starts the day (way too early) by banging on his dad's djembe.

hollis isn't a big talker yet, but he's got some words: mama, dada, sister (kind of), bird (heavy emphasis on the d like bir-dah - so cute), ball, dog, turtle, bye bye, hi, more, bath, water, and all done are all there (i can understand them, at least).  he signs more, all done, so big, and a few animals.  he's pretty good at following directions and very clearly understands what we're saying (even if sometimes he chooses not to comply).  it's weird after having SUCH a verbal first child...but i'm doing my best not to compare.

my friend alison cut his mullet off a few weeks ago and he looks like such a little dude now.  he walks like an old man - legs bowed, belly out.  it's the best.  his eyes are phenomenally blue.  he's not very chubby anymore, but his feet are still little empanadas and he's pretty delicious, if not overly rolly.  he's super independent already, which is a dream come true and a clear sign that he's the second child.  i'm pretty sure he can play by himself for longer than his sister can already (not to compare but...).

anyway.  my little dude.  i love this child overwhelmingly much, even with my sleep deprivation and his occasional cranky 'tude.  now let's please slow it down a little bit on the whole time-passing thing.

festival fans.

this past weekend we loaded up the kids and the double bob and headed to lafayette for festival international.  i really love this festival - we've missed a few years, but when we can swing it, it's an awesome weekend.  live music, street food, people watching.  super fun.

anyway.  the kids had an absolute blast.  ek called it the fall vegetable and she fully embraced the experience.  friday morning we celebrated easter with my parents, which included a super cute nest cake my dad ordered from a local bakery.  then we headed to the fest for the bach lunch.  that was where ek discovered the splash pad and it became her focus for the rest of the weekend.  after lunch/splashing, we went home for kidlets to nap and then headed back to the festival for the evening.  we saw a good band and ate some more and then my parents took the kidlets home so jb and i could play for a bit.  we caught the last part of a band and the first part of a russian gypsy band (jb was way more excited about that one than i was) and then headed to have a drink and visit before calling it a night.  we got home slightly after 11 and just barely missed seeing emme - apparently grandparents don't believe in bedtimes...super fun.

saturday, we went to my grandmother (gg)'s house for burgers and some playing at the neighbors'.  my gram's neighbors have this toy escalade that is motorized.  when emme discovered she could control the car with the gas pedal, it was ON.  she floored that thing and the kids were cackling.  so fun.
after that we headed back to the fest for face painting, snacks, music, and more splash pad.  it was a pretty exhausting but fun day and we all headed home for etouffe and watching frozen.

sunday was time to leave with our tired kidlets.  they were both sound asleep within minutes of getting in the car and took almost 4 hour naps, so they missed the random GIANT fireman's hat rolling down the highway.

please note that emme got that dress from my parents for easter and wore it every day, forcing my mom to wash it each night.