school things.

my sweet baby first-born child starts preK in the fall. i kind of can't believe it, even though she will be five in november, it just feels so so fast. in many (most?) ways, i am crazy excited for her. she is becoming such a voracious little learner and i think she will love school the way i did. the preK program at our neighborhood elementary is really incredible, too - they go on field trips, do mindfulness work, do daily yoga and affirmations, have access to media and science resources that are super exciting...it's going to be great.

what has me on a little bit of a stress attack is the whole after-school care thing. which is going to be a thing for, like, forever. um, what? it's completely overwhelming to think about (for me, right now).

here's the deal. when you are a working parent with young (not yet school-age) children, you know that childcare costs are a given. and somewhere in your brain you think into the future, to the time of school, and for some reason, that time feels like it will offer some respite. in some ways, not all. but definitely in the financial way. or at least, this is how my brain thought about it. like: it will be so crazy because she'll be so big/old/it's going so fast BUT childcare costs will not be an issue, so that's the silver lining.

except that's not true. because kids don't go to school the same hours that you work. so you still have to pay. and it's not even really about the money (money is hard, but it's never the root issue for emotional stuff).

for us, for this preK adventure, it's about trusting that our kidlet is going to be ok - that she's going to be able to handle the load of a school day, topped with a bus ride to her after school care location and whatever she has to handle there. that it's not going to be over-the-top stressful for her or exhausting or brain-overwhelming.

anyway...this is life, i know. kids grow, we adapt to new normals and whatever the reality of whatever we're doing now entails. and this will be no different - it will even be amazing, i think! i'm just about my baby riding a bus all by herself.