8 weeks old.

my darling boy.  tomorrow you turn eight weeks old.  it's blowing my mind.  i will admit this hasn't been the easiest run, but despite the fact that i haven't slept more than 2 consecutive hours in the last eight weeks, i have absolutely adored this time with you.

you are a little bit of a challenge for me, but i think we are figuring each other out.  either that, or you're outgrowing this phase, which is bittersweet as it means time is ticking along much too fast.  i haven't had an easy time figuring out what you need when - you cry a lot more than i am used to, and your cry is so mad and intense, it feels really overwhelming.  since your big sister was my first real experience being around a baby, i fret over your upset-ness a lot more than i might if i knew more about how babies are.  anyway...you cry and fuss quite a bit.  you fight your sleep - really hard.  you are gassy and it makes you really mad.  you can get super ticked about being changed or getting out of the bath.

but.  you are intensely cuddly and have the softest most delicious skin ever.  your little buddha gut and michelin man arm rolls are to die for.  your smile is getting more and more frequent every day and you are giving more eye contact.  your little coos and sounds are delightful.  you've started batting at your toys and that will content you for at least 3-4 minutes at a time.  hahaha!  you love your mama and i love that you settle when you hear my voice or i hold you.  you're strong - holding your head up really well and already rolling tummy to back.  you adore your time in the bath...i think it helps your gas, and you love to turn your head to try to get your face in the water.

we are figuring out morning nap and our nighttime routine.  it feels like it takes forever to get you to go down, but i think it's mostly because i feel all the pressure of having another child and all the un-done stuff around the house.  i'm sorry if i rush you.  you have started spitting up.  still not as badly as your sis did, i don't think...but it breaks my heart, mainly because i remember the perpetual anxiety i had with her, and i feel it now with you, despite your big-ness.  ha.

i guess this post is a little rambly.  i'm tired.  i just wanted to tell you that i love you so so much, even if i seem a little stressed out.  i promise i am doing everything i can to make you feel comfortable and safe here in your home.  you and i are a good team, and we're going to help you relax and feel good.